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Road Tales, #2: Blush And The Silver Fox Show

14th May 2003

The events in the following yarn happened just before my last regular gig, playing with a corporate showband around the function centres and ballrooms of Perth.  It was a lot of fun, although not exactly prog metal and mosh pits... There were, however, some interesting facets to upper-crust corporate showbiz, as this 'Road Tale' (originally written for the Blush website) explains;

In the summer of late 2000 (long before I joined the band), Blush was approached at a gig by a gentleman by the name of Martin Burjeron.  Martin had the idea of making Blush the subject of an episode of the television show he was producing.  For this particular episode, the plan was to take a behind-the-scenes look at the lives of some high-profile entertainers... what did they do when they weren't in the spotlight?  Were all the stories about the infamous "Rock'n'Roll lifestyle" true?  Just what was it these people did all day?

The guys in the band thought it sounded like fun, and agreed to do the show.  As Donna's husband, I was around the band quite a bit, and soon realized that I was not going to get away with just being an amused onlooker!  Oh, no... One thing that hadn't been taken care of for the show was a theme song, and the background music that these types of show always have... Yep, you guessed it... not only did the 'Blush' episode need a soundtrack, but there were two other episodes that were running a little silently, so off I went to my home studio, to create some champagne television... well, champagne television music, anyway...

Little did I know, I was about to become a multi-media personality... Being the 'faces and voices' of Blush, Donna and Monique were, of course, going to be featured heavily in the storyline of the show.  For Martin (who was also the show's presenter and host), this meant going to see the girls wherever they happened to be when he found them.

Host and crew caught up with Monique at the Burswood Resort Gym.  Far from being a debauched party animal, Moni was a fully qualified personal trainer, and probably one of the fittest pop stars in the country!  Sadly for Martin, he only got half of his cheeseburger down, before being thrown on a walking machine.  All, however, was not lost... the crew got some great footage of Mon, and the show's host got to lose a few pounds!

Bruce (keys) and Gavin (drums) were both visited and filmed in the comfort of their own homes without incident - which was exactly what our TV exec's didn't want.  Gavin the removalist and Bruce the businessman were hardly Jagger and Richard... let's face it; they weren't even Sonny and Cher!

Vinnie (bass) was sure to be good for some showbiz goss... he was a real live wire on stage, and always good for a laugh.  Vinnie was at Domino's Pizza, at ten in the morning... "Great!" thinks Martin and his intrepid band of technicians, cameramen and makeup artistes. - Pigging out after a long hard night of letting-it-all-hang out!  They arrive at Domino's, and sure enough, there's Vin... in the kitchen, making pizzas.  After all, a guy's gotta be able to afford bass strings...

The show's last chance for some real dirt lay with the wild woman herself... Donna and I played in heavy rock bands together, so I know first-hand that the lady kicks some major-league butt.  By the time the Silver Fox Show crew arrive at our house to interview the other half of Blush's girl power, however, they have lost all hope of find any skeletons in the closets, or even reds under the beds... Having found myself appointed Musical Director of the show, we'd had a lot of contact with the show's producers, and they know ahead of time that the Greenes at home make Ossie and Harriet look like the Osbornes! I'm quite relaxed about the whole thing... the music's in the bag, and all I have to do is smile at the camera, and get out of the way so Martin can talk to Donna about the real-life world of a working musician. That was how I had it worked out, until a stroke of creative genius finds me in our spa, with presenter and star (hey, that rhymes!), answering questions about the real-life world of a working musician... not happy, Jan!

The water in our spa, year round, sits somewhere just above freezing... the spa is brick and tile, in an atrium, and there is no heater… the intestinal fortitude involved in looking relaxed and comfortable for the camera while your lower limbs are going into spasms is something you don’t know you've got, until the moment is staring you in the face... They got the shots they needed, the crew left happy, knowing they finally had a great episode in the can, and I eventually got the feeling back in my nether regions.... and that, my friends, is another story altogether.....

- Blush's episode of The Silver Fox Show, by the way, was repeated six times by the station, and we were recognized all over Perth for months afterward....

Aaah, the power of television....

Graham Greene

 

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